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Success & Doubts

Some time has passed since I last shared my thoughts, nearly two months to be exact. I am still very much involved in the master's program, and I thrive during the Wednesday night discussions that take up most of our class time. Initial fears are beginning to subside. That's usually how it goes when your efforts meet with success. My "Reflection on Education" earned a perfect 40/40, and I think my principal shadowing paper was among the highest in the class.

Slowly, I am regaining my confidence as a writer, but I find that putting my thoughts into words takes more time than it once did. That may be simply because I'm out of practice, or it may be because I have never tried to wrestle with such complex ideas. My personal philosophy paper, which could be finalized by tomorrow, is a perfect example. I've spent at least 25 hours over the past two weeks trying to envision what it will take to succeed as an educational leader. The result is a 5 page paper that basically ends by insisting failure is not an option. Realizing that was a tough pill to swallow, and even now, I doubt my ability to live up to such a monumental task. Doubt, however, is no excuse for not trying. G'night.

Reflection on Education

What are the 5-6 most important reasons that students do not succeed in schools?

• The increasing divide between home and school environments. There was a time in the not-too-distant past when families and schools held the same expectations for children. This no longer seems to be the case in all circumstances, and students must be prepared to meet these changing demands if they are to be successful.
• The desire for knowledge without an appreciation for learning. Students want to know things, yet many seem to think that knowledge can be spoon-fed. Successful students recognize that learning is a lifelong process that takes time and effort.
• A culture of (extreme) entitlement. Every child is entitled to a public education, but they do not deserve a free pass from one grade to the next. Success in school is not a given. Students and their families must invest time and energy in the process.
• The inability to respond to a dynamic student population. Schools must meet the changing needs of increasingly diverse classrooms if all students are to succeed.
• Peer influences. Youth, particularly at the middle and high school level, may ostracize peers who demonstrate academic success. This contributes to the development of a youth culture that tolerates, even encourages, student failure.
• How do we define success? NCLB defines success in terms of academic proficiency, yet most educators would agree that students can achieve success in other ways.

What are the most important things students should be able to do before graduating?

• Define the problems they face in their lives and apply critical reasoning to solve them.
• Communicate ideas, emotions, and information both verbally and in written form.
• Examine the beliefs and values of their culture, the media, and American society.
• Identify issues facing the world community and develop a global perspective.
• Use technology efficiently to the extent necessary in their daily lives.
• Demonstrate an understanding of basic scientific and mathematical concepts.

What are the most important responsibilities for educational leaders?

• Maintain a safe, secure school environment that fosters learning for all students.
• Define high expectations for every student, staff, and community member in the school.
• Set a tone that challenges students and staff to always perform at their best.
• Be accountable to the needs of families and the demands of the community they serve.
• Recognize the work of all staff members and try to offer the resources they need.
• Identify core values, in cooperation with the staff, and work tirelessly to promote them.

What are the 3 most important questions of our times…?

• How do we justify opposing views and establish common ground for the benefit of all? Without trying to sound political, I fear that too many people are beginning to adopt an “us vs. them” mentality that undermines civil discourse and promotes extremism.
• Where are we going, and how do we intend to get there? This question applies to multiple issues facing the world. It seems too often that we get caught up in the moment, fail to recognize the big picture, and ignore where our decisions may lead.
• What kind of legacy will we leave for the next generation? I am sure that my parents struggled with this question, as did their parents and grandparents. It is a question that every generation must examine, for it is far too important to be ignored.

Thoughts
Teaching is my profession, and I take it very seriously. My wife would say that I take it too seriously at times, allowing it to affect my mood long after the last bell rings. During these times I often become contemplative and wrestle with the questions posed above. Rarely do I write down these thoughts, opting instead to make excuses for why I am too busy or just too lazy to do so. However, when I have a chance to put my thoughts to paper, as I did in this reflection, I am surprised by my own clarity and confusion. I have deeply held some of these ideas for a very long time. Others statements ring true only because of my experiences in the classroom over the past three years.

Take, for example, my views on why students do not succeed in school. I have always believed that students come to school wanting to learn. Only recently did I begin to recognize the distinction between the innate desire for knowledge and the cultivated desire to learn. If students are to be successful, then parents and teachers must help them realize that learning is a lifelong process. I also took for granted the importance of a strong home-school relationship. Having grown up with parents that always seemed to side with the teacher, I knew the expectations were the same whether I was in my living room or my classroom. Many of my students do not have this luxury. I work extensively with at-risk students at a school in one of the poorest neighborhoods in the state. This does not imply that their families do not value education, only that they require different things than the school. Should I expect a student to complete homework every night if their parents need them to babysit until eight o’clock? I now realize that educators who fail to help students balance these opposing demands will do little to help them succeed.

My thoughts are not set in stone. I am not so naïve as to think that I can begin a master’s program having already developed a philosophy on educational leadership. I don’t expect this course to impart any definitive answers either. My goal is to discover new perspectives on these topics, to continue wrestling with these questions, and to ultimately develop a better understanding of what it means to be an educational leader.

Prologue

Am I lost, or just beginning to find my way? Is this the right time to embark on a such a journey? Will I be able to balance the demands of a family, a career, and an education?

As I look towards the future, I'm overwhelmed by these questions. I'm confused by a multitude of conflicting emotions that wash over me: anxiety and pride, worry and curiosity, apprehension and determination. Doubt creeps through my mind.

But if I stop for just a moment, forget the questions, ignore the emotions, and put indecision aside; I feel that I've made the right choice. Experience over the past three years tells me I won't find fulfillment as just a classroom teacher. My heart seeks to reignite the passion that once led me to a career in this field, and my soul thirsts for new knowledge. I've ignored these desires for some time, and it's time I did something about it.

As I pursue a master's degree, stress will become like my shadow. It will put a strain on my career, my relationships, and probably my sanity at some point. But this path will ultimately lead to new insight, new challenges, and new opportunities. I might get lost along the way, but I intend to forge ahead.